© Miri WTPOTUS August 24, 2012
Recently, we were discussing how Michelle Obama, appearing on the Jay Leno program, took it upon herself to publicly chastise Olympic gold-medalist Gabby Douglas for celebrating her win by enjoying an Egg McMuffin.
Actually, Egg McMuffins are tasty and not all that bad for you: 300 calories, 108 of them from fat (which is probably from the cheese, which you could decide to hold).
One of our regular commenters remarked that Michelle shouldn’t talk because she looks as if she’s been “secretly stuffing on Big Macs” herself. I agree but …
Michelle Obama wouldn’t eat a Big Mac, unless McDonald’s made one especially for her with
Ass cheese (aka Donkey cheese; $700/pound, appropriate for her in so many ways),
a Harrod’s Roquefort and Almond sourdough bread bun ($24.50/loaf),
caramelized shallots (as much as $13/pound; onions are too strong for her sensitive palate),
Laeso salt ($29/kilogram),
with a shaving of white truffle (up to $100,000/pound),
just to pull it all together.
Nothing but the very finest for our First Lady, Michelle Antoinette.
PAID FOR BY THE U.S. TAXPAYERS, OF COURSE.
Oddly enough, names originally proposed for the Big Mac were “The Aristocrat” or “The Blue Ribbon Burger”. A Big Mac by any other name would still not be good enough for Michelle.
Of course, Michelle could decide instead to opt for a
Douche Burger ($666) from the 666 Burger Truck in New York City, if she wants to save the taxpayers a little money; but we’d still have to pay for the plane to take her to NYC or to fly the burger to the White House.
I swear, I’m not making up that Douche Burger, nor the name of the truck or the price per burger. See:
Created by Franz Aliquo and the 666 Burger food truck in New York City, the cheeseburger features a Kobe beef patty wrapped in gold leaf, foie gras, caviar, lobster, truffles, imported aged Gruyere cheese, melted with champagne steam, a kopi luwak barbeque sauce and Himalayan rock salt.
The owner of the food truck, Franz Alique has this to say about the world’s most expensive burger,
“It consists of a f—ing burger filled and topped with rich people s–t.”
And that says it all.
Mostly all, that is. I could have entitled this post:
Let Them Eat Cabbage Sloppy Joes
since that’s what Michelle saw fit to feed the “lucky” children who attended the very first “Kids’ State Dinner” at the White House recently.
Doesn’t that sound so yummy? No Wagyu burgers for you, kids!
Photo courtesy of Wiki Commons.
Note: I composed my version of the Michelle Antoinette Burger before I discovered the Douche Burger, proving that there’s no such thing anymore as an original idea. I found more expensive ingredients than Chef Aliquo, but gold leaf never occurred to me. That was an excellent touch, considering the price of gold.